What happens to a dream deferred?
Does it dry up
like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore–
And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over–
like a syrupy sweet?
Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load.
Or does it explode?
Sometimes I get mad at myself for the years wasted. Back when I did GXL magazine, I developed a magazine about a generation of people with a positive image. I was sick and tired of the negative images that flooded the media waves about my generation. So I develop a magazine that became the unheard voice of generation X; knowing God, people and business. Sometimes I wonder if I had continued with it, where I would be. I know I can’t cry over things I should have or would have done. I can only learn from my past and focus on my future with a better understanding.
In retrospect, creating and developing, then walking away from GXL magazine has been a lesson for me. Knowing what you want to do in life is powerful; having an understanding that your choice to do what you want comes with its share of sacrifices is priceless. One must understand when you decide to work on your dreams the benefits can be grand but the moments of uncertainty can be just as overwhelming. If I understood then what I do now, I may not have walked away from GXL. As the brand grew the challenges grew and the responsibilities and lifestyle became a bit much, before long I quit. When someone asked, what I wanted for GXL, I had a ready prepared answer, GXL magazine will be a house hold name; career wise this would have been ideal. However, what I did not think about, is what it meant for me and if I want the responsibility, sacrifice and lifestyle that came with such power?
As I work on my blog and my network grows, I find that question keep coming to the surface; what do I want? I have been imagining places my writing career would take me. I can see myself working at a magazine as an editor, even a publisher; becoming a best seller author delivering novels that keep book lovers trap between pages, making a comfortable living and becoming a part of a brand people recognize. Ultimately like any artist I want to enjoy the experience of creating. I want to have that feeling you get after hard work pays off. I want my work recognized and respected from my readers and colleagues. I want monetary opportunities to become the result of hard work and dedication. My imagination runs wild when it comes to the different opportunities that may open to me as a writer. This time I do not want to limit myself and what I can do with the misunderstanding that living my dream will be easy, because not living it has not been worth it.
Various inspirations tell us we can do it! The article you read, the interview you hear of your favorite, telling their story of how they did it. The part of the story often not told is that living the dream is not easy, if it was everyone would do it. However the benefits of doing what you love and the feeling that you are fulfilling your purpose is priceless.
Are you ready to pay your dues to live your dream?
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